I had a very sobering experience last evening, when I was leading the Bible Study here in Feltham. We were studying Isaiah 31:1-9. I had started ok going through verse 1 and then we came to verse 2. I just looked at the verse and thought “I don’t know what this really means”. I made some vague comments and moved on into verse 3. I found myself then just drifting away from the passage. I was opening my mouth and uttering some words which I trust was not totally gobbledygook, but I was struggling. I felt myself getting hot, my face going red.
Interestingly, May Lin spotted my plight and started to pray to the Lord for me. Graciously the Lord answered her prayer. By the time we were on to verse 4 I think I had got some sense back, but I was still of a measure reeling from what I had experienced. We got through the final verses hopefully with some profit.
But all this was a sobering experience. I was certainly feeling the aftermath into the evening that followed. But I felt there was something absolutely critical to learn and that was the need to be completely dependant upon God. When you have preached or led publicly a number of times you can to a degree “ad-lib” it. But last night showed me I need the Lord in order to do anything that is for His glory. I trust I will now be thoughtful to seek the Lord for His enabling always in anything I do, and particularly in a public format.
Lord I need You!